What you learn from FullMetal Alchemist
by Izzy.Amorim
Summary: 53 things yor learn after watching the anime and reading the manga. Reviews please?


**What you learn from FullMetal Alchemist**

6 feet tall armors are cute!!

Reviving someone us a stupid ideia. Really. DO NOT try it.

Never, I mean, NEVER, call someone "shorty".

If you're cool and fans like you – you're gonna die.

If you love your daughter above everything and everyone, you'll die by someone in your wife's cosplay.

Do you know the girl with moron face? She's got a wrench.

The wrench hurts LIKE HELL.

If a guy with a scar with the shape of "X" talks to you, NEVER say you're a State Alchemist.

The best way of training your pet is shootin at it.

The best slave's not Watanuki, but the puppy your employees' adopted.

Never follow your elder brother – He will do some dumb stuff and you'll get in shit too.

Especially if he's talking about reviving your mother.

If you lose your body, you'll notice how much you miss apples pie.

Do you know the kind boy, who likes you? He's gonna try to kill next time you meet each other.

If you are handsome and genial – you're useless in the rain.

If you're useless in the rain – beware of your employee (friend). She will give you a pitfall.

Be suspicious of priests who are too kind with you. Especially if he is talking about reviving your boyfriend.

Be suspicious of adorable fathers, with adorable daughters and huge dogs.

If you're fighting and your pal is fat, be careful – he's going to fall over you.

Never try to take a cat out of an armor.

But, if you are the armor, do not run with the cat inside – otherwise he'll become a cat purée.

Think carefully before slaping an armor to make it learn about doing dangerous things without adults' supervision – because metal HURTS, you jackass!!!

Do something kinda intelligent and do not break your automail twice in the same day.

Do not trust a brat who comes suddenly willing to buy your mines.

Do not trust people who says your best friend has gone to the country with wife and daughter.

If you see an armor with skull face, run – he will fall in love with you.

The best way of invading a high security place is by the front door.

If she's the brawny bald's siter, it doesn't mean she's like him.  
Ok, maybe she is.

Strange bones in a place everybody knows as haunted? Calm down. It's just the puppy's lunch.

Do you know the straight-line girl, who would never wear a piercing? She's got a HUGE tattoo on her back.

If someone asks you "Do you like her?", spit out the tea in the dog's face by accident and "yes" are the same.

In the Northern, only the toughest ones are able to survive.

Remember the psycho butcher youe'v sent to jail? He's gonna come back. Much, MUCH worse.

Red jack means you are strong.

Or maybe, shorty.

If your father knows too much, he will die soon and use you to hide his greatest secret.

If there's a guy who's fuckin' tall, fuckin' strong and fuckin' annoying, his sisters are very beautiful – even though it's advisable not to try anything with none of them.

Someone is going to take your girlfriend!

If you have lost your arm and your leg while trying to revive your mother, relax: both are ok. In a freakin' strange boy's body, but absolutely able to use.

If you're in trouble, drawn an circle in the ground.

Or clap your hands...

If someone kills an chimera inside of you, you will remember of traumatic things. But you are going to be strong as hell!

If your sensei stends you the hand to a shaking-hands, be careful – se is going to throw you away to make sure you are still the "stupid student"

No, drinking milk does not help you growing up.

If your sensei is always spiting blood and telling you not to try to revive people, trust her, for God's sake!!

Do not date big breasted girls. Or you'll get in serious shit.

It's not advisable to ask for information to a florist. She will obligate you to buy ALL the damn flowers.

She has accepted to train you? Do not cheer up so much: you are going to remain in an island for one mounth, prohibited from using alchemy and with a crazy monster.

If you're about to be swallowed, don't worry. Your puppy is coming to save you.

The heroes arrive last.

If your automail isn't working – you've missed a bolt.

If they say he wears a red jacket, is blond and has gold eyes, don't keep imaginating things: he is NOT a 6 feet tall prince.

You cannot gain something unless you loss another one. To obtain something, you need some other thing with equal value. This is the Alchemy Conservation Law.

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**Hi, minna-san! I've been taking a look at this fanfiction recently and I almost cried when I saw so many shitty mistakes. But now I corrected everything I could, sorry for the mistakes ^^' **

**Reviews, please!**

**kisu ^^**


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